I’m a planner. When I was 38 I realized I couldn’t keep up with my then 3 year old at the park. Her high energy antics wore me out in no time. It was then that a friend mentioned Crossfit to me, and that led me to the decision to be stronger and healthier at 40 than I was at 38.  Along with joining a nearby Crossfit gym, I also began to color my hair (hide the random grey hairs appearing more frequently than I wanted to admit to). It was the beginning of my battle to own being “Forty and Fabulous”!

Fast-forward to my 40^th birthday. It was amazing! Surrounded by my friends, I celebrated being 40 and also celebrated the way I felt and looked. Life was good. Damn good!

Being 40 unfortunately is lending itself to be the most challenging year of my life– emotionally and physically, than I ever expected. Shortly after my birthday my Mother became ill and began her own battle with her health. After about 5 months she went through surgery which resulted in complications that kept her in the hospital for 10 days. I thought I had it. I thought I was on top of the stress. I’d gone to 3 massage appointments in 6 weeks to help me relax. I continued to crossfit to relieve stress and help me get the deep, re-energizing sleep I needed to keep moving forward, and stay strong  as my Mother’s  sole support. I thought I had it, I really did. Then, just as she cleared the hospital and headed to rehab I got the flu. Then after a week of the flu I developed full blown pneumonia and was knocked out of commission for an entire month of December. I lived on the couch. I didn’t go to work. I didn’t see anyone. I just worked on regaining my ability to breathe and be me again.

I’m tough. I healed. Life moved on. A new year began.

I had my annual OB-GYN check-up  the end of February 2015 and, being 40, had my first mammogram. BAM! Right out of the gate I earned a call back for a follow up mammogram. Then a follow up biopsy. Then I was told I had stage 1 breast cancer – one small, 1.0 cm tumor and a second, 5 mm tumor. Further testing showed that I was Her2 positive. In the space of a month I went from a healthy “Forty and Fabulous” to a breast cancer statistic. I suddenly had more appointments and biopsies and tests than I could imagine. Doctors were talking about chemotherapy, putting in a port, surgery with a possible full mastectomy and rebuilding my chest and the Patient Navigator was giving me helpful insight about the chemo class I should attend at the local hospital and helping me make an appointment at the local cancer wig boutique.

Are you kidding me?! What happened to me?! Life happened. No one can plan for it and this certainly wasn’t in the plans for me.

Given my wild and crazy start to 2015, I’ve chosen to write a blog/journal to share my experiences with anyone else who might find it useful.  I’ve got a lot of tools on my tool belt to help me get through this and if they can help you or someone you know, please share my stories with them.